Things are moving so quickly right now. I feel like I haven't taken a breath. Obviously I have or I would have a TBI based on oxygen deprivation. Maddi has improved so much in the last week. Her attention and initiation of tasks has increased by at least 50%.

Today in Speech we did a task that we had worked on last week. Last week it took two separate times and lots of prompting to complete the 12 choose the right word problems. Today, Maddi picked up the pencil and just went to town and completed the entire worksheet in such a short time. She didn't even need us to use another sheet of paper to cover those questions we were not working on yet.

Her rate of speech has slowed down and her voice tone is improving. She has an appointment to see another ENT guy who specializes in vocalization issues on Thursday. We have also been working on theoretical scenarios for safety to make sure her reasoning and solutions to problems are appropriate for the situation. It is amazing how many things we take for granted in just average childhood development. She really is improving!

In OT we are working on problem solving and reasoning skills using games needing strategy to win. They are specific for what Maddi needs. I don't want people to get the idea that we are just playing games because that is not the case but we are using games to facilitate those skills we need to develop.

On the PT shoreline it is still all about core muscles! She is doing fabulous in motor navigation but she is masking or hiding those weak areas by compensating with the stronger muscles. The idea of getting Maddi into a Yoga or Pilates class was discussed and recommended as part of our getting home plan. I am pretty sure in my neck of the woods there aren't any of those classes specific for kids. I think this will be a joint operation for Maddi and I.

Music Therapy has kind of turned Maddi into a star. They did an interview with her and filmed her interacting with the music therapist today. It is scheduled to air on KSL next Wednesday at 11:00, I am assuming in the morning. Music Therapy is often seen as an unessential part of her type of healing so the funding is always being cut. With Brain Injury, music interacts neurologically differently than any other learning. It is stored differently and is accessed at a different level. It highly effective for memory retrieval and to cement new learning.

Maddi's focus has been about helping people and giving them hope. When she was asked if she would talk to them she saw it as a way to help people. John and I had to give consent and of course we did. I just wished we had been given more notice. I would have done something better with my hair. It was a ponytail day. I decided that it was an "Oh, well" moment. We can't all have a good hair day. I guess mine was just captured on TV for everyone to see. If anything this situation has taught me that my needs are generally insignificant. Hopefully they will edit John and I out and just have the focus be on Maddi!

I am feeling weary of not being home. So is Maddi. We had great outing over the weekend that helped us feel more normal but it still isn't being home! I miss my other kids, my dogs and my first graders. I miss feeling like I have any say in things at all. This experience is not for those people who want to control every aspect of their lives. I gave up on that a long time ago but I sure under appreciated those areas that I did have choice like being able to decide on things like, shower time, clothing ( living out of a suitcase limits your choices), bedtime, mealtime, recreation time and place. Having all my kids in one place doing what we want without a curfew.

I don't mean to complain. The blessing have been overwhelming! Maddi is doing so much better than anyone ever thought she could do. I have said it before but.................
Remarkable
Miraculous
Amazing
Unbelievable
...........are all words used to describe her recovery by the doctors who knew and understood more about her injuries than John and I could begin to learn. I am so grateful for a merciful God in Heaven that allowed Maddi this miracle. I knew that God wired her brain the first time so he COULD wire her again. That being said I knew that it had to be HIS will not mine for that to happen.

I don't know why Maddi has been granted this miracle when so many other people haven't. It is hard for me to watch others around us having different outcomes and not feel unworthy of such a beautiful blessing given to Maddi. I know that I am just the mom and this journey is hers but I have been walking beside her with every step.

Early on in this journey I mentioned that I am Forever Altered. When you take a garment in to the tailor it is always to get a better fit. As I have thought about that title I feel it has deeper significance than I originally realized. My seams, cuffs, hems and sleeves have been Altered to allow for space and trimmed where it is needed. A little tuck here and a hem there is creating a better fit for a better outlook on life and a deeper appreciate for those tender mercies and gifts of God that are all around us. The fabric is sound and of good quality, it just needs a bit of work.

Anyway, I tend to turn my experiences in to parables so I apologize.
Gratitude is overflowing in my heart for great friends, family, doctors and strangers who have prayed on our behalf. I have the deepest heartfelt testimony that there is a God in Heaven, who knows us by name! He knows the desires of our hearts and supports us in those times of deepest sorrow. He has a plan for us though we may not understand his will, it ALL has purpose. Even those outcomes that are not what we desire there is a reason. That doesn't mean that I haven't had my days. I have but it is all about coming over to the Lord's side.

"He leadeth my soul where the still waters flow"
"He maketh me lie down in green pastures."
Only HE knows where the still waters are and where the green pastures can be found.

The grass is truly greener on the Lord's side.